imusntrunaway | IC >> INBOX (EXSILIUM)

[The small things that Shintaro mentioned about her shifts into perspective now. About how he missed his chance before, how he couldn't leave her on her own-- and Shinji, for once, understands how someone else feels.]

Are you all right?

[Shintaro pauses. He's not all right, and he hasn't been for years and he doesn't see any "all right"s in the future, either.]

... I'm better than the first time it happened.

[It's not a positive answer, not that Shinji was expecting one. When he lost Kaworu everything had plunged downwards. It wouldn't be any surprise if Shintaro was the same. There's a moment of silence on his end before he speaks up again.]

... I bought some fruit before we evacuated. Do you want some? [Do you want to come and talk about it?]

... Yeah.

I haven't had fruits in a few weeks. That'd be nice. [It would be nice to look at someone who doesn't make him think about either of Ayano's disappearances, too. He doesn't like the feeling of using Shinji that nags at the back of his mind again, but if it's being offered, he'd like to take it. He doesn't want to fall back into what happened last time no matter what Erika says about how he deserves to.

He pauses and speaks again, voice a little louder and more steady than earlier.]

Which room were you in, this time?

[He's already getting out of bed to grab the fruits.] 191. Is it close to yours?

Uh... yeah. If you're on the east wing. Which wing are you on?

[Oh. Right.]

I'm on the west wing. We can meet up halfway if you want.

I can make it to your room. Just-- give me a few minutes. I'm not even in my room, so it'll be fine.

Okay.

I'll see you, then.

... Okay. Thanks, Ikari.

[He regrets the decision almost as soon as he closes the tablet. Why did he just agree to meet up with him? He isn't ready to see people. He went to see Kido because it was necessary; he sees Ene and Momo because they're there. But Shinji--? He almost calls to say never mind, he's fine as long as there was an answer.

Aah but -- is he running away, like that? Maybe he just doesn't want to see anyone. Maybe he just wants to be alone, like before. He closes his eyes and sighs, peeling his feet off the floor and making his way to Shinji's apartment. It's too late to back out of the appointment anyway. He will knock on the door quietly.]

[Shintaro told Shinji that he'd introduce him to Ayano, a long time ago. But the chance is gone completely now. He never met the girl, but he can relate for once to how it must feel.

When it happened to him, he only wanted to be alone. Kaworu's death, Rei's disappearances-- both of those threatened to shove Shinji into solitude and out into the vast wasteland outside of Exsilium. In the end, he might only be an annoyance to Shintaro.

It's fine if Shintaro doesn't show up. Shinji would understand. He has no business offering a hand, anyway. It's meddling in affairs to an extent he normally wouldn't.

The knocks are an answer. Shinji stands up, opening the door. A bag of fruit is in one hand, just as he said.]

Shintaro. [A beat as he looks the other boy over.] Um, hello.

[There's tension in his shoulders that he releases when he sees Shinji, but he curls his fingers against his palm and tries not to frown too much.]

Hey... sorry. One of these days I'll give you more warning.

... Sorry. Did you worry?

... I didn't think you'd do anything stupid. [It's an honest response. He offers the bag of fruits.] Here. These are okay with you, right?

[He raises his hands to take the fruits, nodding.] Yeah, they're fine. ... This a lot. You're okay with me taking it?

You'd probably need it more than me. Anyway, I can go on missions to get more...

... You're okay with the missions?

Nothing'd get done if we didn't make them.

There are over one hundred of us. But if you say so.

[He notes to himself that Shinji's definitely a better sort of person than he is.]

[Sighs. He sort of slumps.]

They're not dangerous anyway... [He hesitates.] You're fine, right?

... Who knows?

[He lets out a breath, a sort of "ha" that can be dry laughter or a short sigh.]

It's different from before. The situation, the people around... and me. So I have no idea, but I'll probably manage.

... I lost a lot of friends, too. [Shinji doesn't know why he's telling him this. Maybe, deep down, he thought it'd help in some way.] So... it's all right if you want to talk about it.

... Is it something you want to hear? [He appreciates it. But he doesn't want to push anything on to the poor guy if he's just offering because he's nice.]

[It isn't, of course. A person kinder than him would agree right away. Shinji, who's always been afraid of intimacy, isn't certain about opening up so much.

--but that's the lesson Kaworu's been trying to teach him. Hasn't it? He meets Shintaro's eyes.]

... I wouldn't ask to see you like this if I didn't.

[He looks away, a small sigh. Shinji's probably not comfortable, but he's reaching out. To help him? Like everyone always did...]

Thanks.

... I think I'll take up your offer. You want to go to the observatory?

[Hearing his offer accepted makes him smile a bit for a reason he can't really place.

He never had anyone to talk to about these sorts of things. He's glad that he's given Shintaro the chance to.]

Mm. [He steps out, shuts the door behind him.] Let's head out.

(no subject)

substitutable - 2013-11-26 22:59 (UTC) - Expand

IC >> INBOX (EXSILIUM)

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice;

voice --> action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

action;

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)