imusntrunaway | IC >> INBOX (EXSILIUM)

I won't want to eat it tomorrow. [When Shinji steps aside, Shintaro takes a step in. He's got the ice cream in the crook of his arm, a spoon in his mouth, a spare spoon in his hand. He's got his tablet in the other hand.]

That's why you save it for another day.

[He normally wouldn't be this snippy towards someone he didn't know too well, but it's late and he's unused to company being forced on him. Nonetheless, he leads Shintaro to the kitchen where he turns on the lights. If he's forced to play the host, he'll do it.]

... do you want anything to drink?

... Can I have some water?

[He puts the ice cream down on the counter, but doesn't sit. Shinji's spoon he places on top of the carton, and his own, he takes into his now freed hand.]

[He brings out a cup and fills it with warm water from the sink. Setting it down on the counter for Shintaro, he glances at the ice cream.

... he knows he's expected to eat it. So he doesn't ask the other any questions as he opens it up, taking a small scoop to eat.]

... you didn't have to go through the trouble of coming up here.

Thanks. [Shintaro takes the cup into his hands, spoon still held in one. It's warm, and he pauses a moment before he drinks it. Cold water might have been nicer, but he doesn't complain.]

... It wasn't trouble. [So this is justified.]

[It is for him, Shinji wants to say. But he keeps silent as he pulls up a seat and scoops at the ice cream, eating small bites out of politeness rather than anything else.

It's puzzling him, actually, why Shintaro would want to show up to his apartment. Even if the question's written over his face, he doesn't ask.]

Mm. [Instead, a small noise of consent as he dips his head and quietly eats. A silence falls on them.]

[Shintaro sips at his water some more, then eventually decides it is too warm for him right now. He takes his spoon, taking a scoop of ice cream and eating it, too. At least the carton he brought isn't too big.]

.... Thanks.

... next time, call ahead of time. I was sleeping. [He's a little less grouchy since the ice cream does taste pretty good. But he's still annoyed. He hunches over as he stabs at his ice cream with the spoon, leaving pockmarks.]

[There can be a next time?]

... It's not-- oh...

Sorry. I'll do that.

[~~He didn't mean to let that slip.~~ He keeps on poking holes. After a length, he mutters as if trying not to let Shintaro here.]

If you can't sleep there's better ways to deal with it. [Like lying awake in bed with your headphones plugged in.]

... I can sleep. I don't want to.

[He's exhausted. He feels like he's going to fall over sometimes. But if he sleeps before he passes out he has weird dreams.]

What about you, anyway? For being asleep you responded pretty quickly.

[He still doesn't sleep well, even though it's been month he's had to do anything remotely close to piloting or fighting. But the nightmares don't go away. Neither do his father's face.]

I'm a light sleeper. [He'd been lying. He'd been awake, staring at the network, seeing the reactions of everyone towards the mission.]

I see. Sorry I woke you up. [Not sorry enough to leave, though, it appears. He eats another spoonful of ice cream.]

... Is Nagisa-san the only person you know from your place?

[He tenses a little at the mention of Kaworu's name, but when it's clear that the inquiry isn't focused on him the tension ebbs out.]

... no. [There's been a lot of people from his world, if he thought about it. Should he consider himself lucky?] Um, some of my friends... colleagues are here, too.

There's a few of you, huh? [He chews on his spoon.] It's sort of the same here.

... Be careful.

[Shinji looks up at that.]

You and your friends... did you go on the mission?

[Shintaro's hand stops as he's taking the spoon out of his mouth, and he stares ahead for a second, frozen, before he resumes moving, poking at the ice cream.]

Yeah.

We went.

[Shinji isn't the sort to pry into another's business, especially not on that sort of subject. He drops his gaze.]

... some of my friends fought, too. But I didn't. [He stayed behind, because he was useless.] I ran supplies.

... That's smart. Maybe we should've done that too.

[He finally stops murdering his ice cream and takes a bite.]

It wasn't as bad. [He's muttering now.] But seeing the patients come in...

[He leaves his spoon in the ice cream.] ... I thought we'd lose the Hold.

... We might, eventually. It's war.

You don't think we'll win?

I don't know. I've never been in a war before and this doesn't work like movies or video games. But they got pretty close in six hours...

Who knows?

[It isn't fair, he thinks. If he has to die somewhere, let him die at home. Even if home is gone, wouldn't it be better to spend your last minutes in a place you knew the best...?

He lapses into a gloomy silence.]

... it still doesn't make sense.

Huh?

[He has a mouthful of ice cream.]

Waf woznt?

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