shinji, you fucker (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
imusntrunaway) wrote2023-01-02 11:10 pm
imusntrunaway) wrote2023-01-02 11:10 pm
IC >> INBOX (EXSILIUM)
The person you are trying to call is not available. Please leave a message after the beep.
[Beeeeeeeeeeeep.]
The person you are trying to call is not available. Please leave a message after the beep.
[Beeeeeeeeeeeep.]
... he listened to me too. [It's scarcely relevant. But he feels the need to bring it up. There's another moment of silence.]
Does it help?
Does it help?
Why do you care?
[It's instinctive to lash out. To try and hide behind harsh words and indifference. She pauses and lets the silence roll on until she mumbles another reply.]
...yeah. It does.
[She all but admitted that she's weak. To Ikari.
She feels like she's going to throw up.]
[It's instinctive to lash out. To try and hide behind harsh words and indifference. She pauses and lets the silence roll on until she mumbles another reply.]
...yeah. It does.
[She all but admitted that she's weak. To Ikari.
She feels like she's going to throw up.]
[Asuka's always been the loudest out of them, the one wonder child who drew all the eyes to her. And Shinji accepted it. She was the brighter one compared to him, demanding and gaining compliments he quietly wished he could have. That was simply the way it was.
He's caught glimpses of her weakness beneath that armor--that one time when he almost kissed her, her fight with Arael--but she's always lashed out whenever he got too close. So he kept his distance.
That was just how it was.]
I don't care if you talk to him. [He mumbles it. It unexpectedly hurts to say.] If it helps you...
He's caught glimpses of her weakness beneath that armor--that one time when he almost kissed her, her fight with Arael--but she's always lashed out whenever he got too close. So he kept his distance.
That was just how it was.]
I don't care if you talk to him. [He mumbles it. It unexpectedly hurts to say.] If it helps you...
He isn't yours, anyway.
[Asuka retorts, but it's weak. Then she goes on.]
You're not supposed to know about that. About me.
[Asuka retorts, but it's weak. Then she goes on.]
You're not supposed to know about that. About me.
[She's right. Weak as it is, it stings him.]
I won't talk about it. [That's what Kaworu is for. All he can offer are apologies and not much else.]
I won't talk about it. [That's what Kaworu is for. All he can offer are apologies and not much else.]
Gee, thanks.
[Her tone is bitter and sarcastic and cutting.]
You hate me already, so why does it matter?
[Her tone is bitter and sarcastic and cutting.]
You hate me already, so why does it matter?
Edited 2013-05-11 06:11 (UTC)
[That catches him by surprise.]
Hate you--? [He thinks about the times she's screamed at him and fought with him. Does he hate her?]
... sometimes, when we talk. You're bothersome and rude. [A pause as he thinks about it.] If it makes you uncomfortable... I won't ask. That's common courtesy.
Hate you--? [He thinks about the times she's screamed at him and fought with him. Does he hate her?]
... sometimes, when we talk. You're bothersome and rude. [A pause as he thinks about it.] If it makes you uncomfortable... I won't ask. That's common courtesy.
Why wouldn't you hate me?
[her tone still has that mocking, bitter ring to it.]
I hate me. Why shouldn't you?
[her tone still has that mocking, bitter ring to it.]
I hate me. Why shouldn't you?
It doesn't matter if I do.
You'll still be here.
You'll still be here.
So you'd be happier if I just disappeared?
[There's a little choke in her voice that she can't quite hide.]
[There's a little choke in her voice that she can't quite hide.]
[His answer is instantaneous, almost without thought:] No, that's not what I'm saying--!
[He stops himself before he can stumble into another apology. Bitterness tinges his voice.] We're stuck here.
[His trip to the wastelands accomplished nothing. Running away only brought him into a circle. No matter how much he wished, he couldn't go home (was there ever a home for him?), he couldn't leave Exsilium and its responsibilities, couldn't shut his eyes to Asuka as she was there whenever he took tentative steps into the new world. They were all trapped here, stripped of the only thing that made them valuable. For them, the only escape was to be sent back to their deaths.]
You and Kaworu, Rei and Toji... all of us...
[His voice dwindles.] We're the last ones.
[He stops himself before he can stumble into another apology. Bitterness tinges his voice.] We're stuck here.
[His trip to the wastelands accomplished nothing. Running away only brought him into a circle. No matter how much he wished, he couldn't go home (was there ever a home for him?), he couldn't leave Exsilium and its responsibilities, couldn't shut his eyes to Asuka as she was there whenever he took tentative steps into the new world. They were all trapped here, stripped of the only thing that made them valuable. For them, the only escape was to be sent back to their deaths.]
You and Kaworu, Rei and Toji... all of us...
[His voice dwindles.] We're the last ones.
hey do you want some ice cream?
[a few minutes later: context]
i bought too much
[a few minutes later: context]
i bought too much
[... he's never received a text like this before.]
Isn't it too late for ice cream?
Isn't it too late for ice cream?
if you're awake right now it's not too late.
... it's the middle of the night. Most people would think calling someone over to eat ice cream at this time as strange. [Unless they're emotional wrecks who've lost control of their lives-- no, let's not think about that.]
Yes.
I'd take it if you had offered it earlier...
I'd take it if you had offered it earlier...
you've never had midnight snacks before? you're really a teenager?
[says the hikineet]
[says the hikineet]
Ice cream isn't a good midnight snack. Besides, it's too cold and it's fattening.
[Excuse you, he can be normal!!]
[Excuse you, he can be normal!!]
one ice cream isn't going to make you blow up like santa claus. i'm going up.
[you thought you had a choice?]
[you thought you had a choice?]
[Wait wait wait what just happened.]
Wait, everyone is still asleep!
Wait, everyone is still asleep!
so i'll text you when i get there. that works, right?
... it doesn't matter if I say 'no' because you're already coming, aren't you.
halfway up the staircase to the seven floor.
[From the other end, Shinji sighs.]
Please be quiet.
Please be quiet.
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